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Sunday, November 1, 2009

[HI] Making Karolyn Alford's murder matter - Crying out for the living to care

Women Helping Women staffer Marline Fernandez holds a sign decrying the murder of Karolyn Alford while participating in a vigil along Kaahumanu Avenue on Thursday.

Previous posts on Karolyn:

Makawao resident apparent victim of murder-suicide involving husband
Maui News
By LILA FUJIMOTO, Staff Writer
POSTED: October 27, 2009

KAHULUI - With a sign-waving vigil planned Thursday afternoon in memory of Makawao resident Karolyn Alford, who was shot by her husband in an apparent murder-suicide last week, advocates against domestic violence stress that there are resources for people who are worried about a relative, friend or co-worker.

At times, people can have an effect simply by letting friends know they're ready to help, said Sheri Daniels, Maui administrator of Child & Family Service.

"It's hard because we live in a society where sometimes you don't want to intervene. A lot of times people don't want to think the worst of anybody," Daniels said. "When it's somebody close to you, sometimes that's the hardest.

"Sometimes, people just have to say, 'Are you OK?' and ask if they can help. Let the person know you're available."

Police said 58-year-old Karolyn Alford was shot twice by her husband, Barry Alford, 59, a former Maui police officer who then shot himself. Officers responding to a 911 call at 10:15 p.m. Oct. 19 discovered the couple's bodies in the home on Iini Way.

The vigil for Karolyn Alford will be held from 4 to 4:45 p.m. fronting Maui Mall near the planned Whole Foods store in Kahului.

Immediately afterward, a Domestic Violence Awareness Month vigil and presentation will be held at the mall's center stage. Peace Peeps, comprising children who are survivors of domestic violence, is hosting the vigil for the second year.

Stacey Moniz, executive director of Women Helping Women, said people might be shocked to learn that someone they know could be a victim of domestic violence. But one thing friends or co-workers can do is ask if the person knows how to get help, including by calling the agency's domestic violence hot line at 579-9581.

"Domestic violence is very isolating," Moniz said. "I would ask people, 'Are you aware there are places that can help you?' "

Child & Family Service also offers domestic violence referrals to people who call the agency at 877-9888. Parents and Children Together, another nonprofit agency providing domestic violence intervention services, can be reached at 244-2330.

Another resource is the state Department of Health access to mental health services hot line at (800) 753-6879.

People can call the police nonemergency line if they want officers to check on the welfare of someone they're worried about, Daniels said.

If people see domestic violence occurring in a public place, such as a store parking lot, they should call 911 and try to provide detailed information, such as a license plate number and description of a vehicle involved, Daniels said.

With the holiday season approaching, Daniels recommended that people check in with friends they may not have seen or talked to for a while to find out how they're doing. "Make the effort to reconnect with people," she said. "We forget we can pick up the phone and call."

* Lila Fujimoto can be reached at [LINK]

Maui News
Photographer Matthew Thayer
POSTED: October 30, 2009
Sign wavers along Kaahumanu Avenue conduct a vigil in memory of Makawao resident Karolyn Alford who was shot and killed by her husband in an apparent murder-suicide Oct. 19. Women Helping Women staffer Marline Fernandez holds a sign decrying the murder of Karolyn Alford while participating in a vigil along Kaahumanu Avenue on Thursday. Fernandez said it is time for victims of domestic violence, and the neighbors of victims, to speak out. "If people hear their neighbors arguing, call. Call the police," she said. "I'd rather have people call the police than have another tragedy like this one." Fernandez said that budget cuts have taken a toll on the services available for victims. "We have to cut back on workers, cut back on hours. It's sad because there are more people" in need, she said. [LINK]

Women Helping Women
1935 Main St
Wailuku, HI 96793-1784
(808) 579-9581
[police officer involved domestic violence law enforcement fatality fatalities murder suicide activism hawaii state]

1 comment:

  1. I didn't Want to mention this until after Karolyn was buried, but in the last post I did on Karolyn, the excerpts that I made large I selected for a reason... I just couldn't say yet what the reason WAS. Here it is.

    Police wives who are in presently good or decent relationships with officers think that when they defend the police family, that they also somehow belong to that family - even if it's a sort of as a secondary citizenship by association. The believe they are standing up for their man, his department, and in a sense their own household's values.

    HOWEVER - police wives are NOT a part of the police family. They just don't know it until they are abused or have a gun held to their head or their life is threatened by their husband or file for divorce.

    Nothing is ALWAYS true. There are exceptions. But I've collected thousands of stories since 2003 and it's the rule.

    From the last post I did on Karolyn and her killer husband:

    "...Police now say one of the dead was one of their own..."

    "It's a sad day for the Maui Police Department, being that Barry Alford was a former employee of our department" Maui County Police Chief Gary Yabuta said Wednesday...

    "We are saddened for the family of the late Barry and Karolyn Alford. The department will be missing a fine former employee. Former Sgt. Alford was a dependable employee..."

    "I think it's sad." Capt. Larry Hudson, who got to know Alford both on and off the job, said he was surprised to hear about what happened. "He was very professional, and he was personable at the same time"...


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