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Friday, October 2, 2009

[NY] Kristin just wanted things to be better

...Kristin Longo’s desire for a divorce not only stemmed from marital troubles over her husband’s alleged infidelity and threats of violence; it also was meant to end the longtime verbal abuse she and her four children had to endure... "The course of action that she took is consistent with an abused person who was trying to appease her husband and trying to work things out in a fashion that is not scandalous”...

Previous blog post here.

Oct 1, 2009
[Excerpts] Just days after the tragic death of Kristin Palumbo Longo at the hands of her husband - Joseph Longo Jr. - during a killing/suicide in their Cosby Manor Road Home, the family of Kristin Palumbo Longo says they are honoring her memory, but looking to the future of her children. "Our family wishes to extend our gratitude for the tremendous outpouring of love and support," the family said in a statement. "Our priorities at this time are to ensure that the immediate and future needs of the children are met and that we honor the life and memory of our beloved Kristin. We ask that everyone please respect the privacy of the family and appreciate your continued support"... State Police, who are investigating the crime, say that neither they nor Oneida County Sheriff's deputies had ever responded to the Longo's Deerfield home for any kind of domestic dispute... On Tuesday, Utica Police Chief Daniel LaBella - Longo's former partner of five years - said that the department had pulled Longo's gun about a month ago, stemming from an incident at Proctor High School... Ironically, Longo's disciplinary hearing for that incident was supposed to happen Tuesday morning... Chief LaBella also confirms that Longo did appear in Oneida County Family Court Monday, and that he was despondent over situations regarding his marriage. Court documents show the two had several recent court appearances regarding apparent divorce proceedings and settlements. Chief LaBella says the department saw Longo suffering and made counseling available to him, and that Longo was in the process of taking advantage of the counseling. Still, LaBella says he never saw this coming. "The police department here did everything possible," LaBella said... The chief says the department is starting a fund drive for the couple's four children, whom he says are the real victims in this tragedy. [Full article here]

ATTORNEYS FOR LONGOS SPEAK OF HOURS PRECEDING DEATHS Both seemed calm after divorce proceedings
Last update Oct 01, 2009
[Excerpts] When Utica police Investigator Joseph Longo Jr. left divorce proceedings Monday, he didn’t appear to be angry about what was going on, his attorney, Devin Garramone, said Wednesday. Likewise, his wife, Kristin Longo, seemed satisfied with how the day’s proceedings had ended, according to her attorney, George Massoud.... While Longo Jr.’s reasons for stabbing his wife more than a dozen times later that afternoon inside their Deerfield home will forever remain left to speculation, his attorney offered what he believed might have pushed the 13-year police veteran over the edge. "He was still in love with her, and I think that he would have been happier to reconcile with her than get a divorce, but then it finally dawned on him that he was losing his wife,” said Garramone. "The prospect of losing her, and her meeting somebody else and starting a new life, it freaked him out,” Garramone added. “Like any typical break-up, there was a period of reckoning, and I think that’s where he was at. It was a real critical point, and he just went overboard”... Although Kristin Longo, 39, did fear for her safety as her husband’s emotional stability spiraled downward in the weeks leading up to the murder-suicide, she appeared to believe everything would be OK after Monday’s appearance in state Supreme Court, Massoud said. At Kristin Longo’s request, Acting Supreme Court Justice James Griffith issued a “refrain from” order prohibiting Longo Jr. from assaulting, harassing, stalking, menacing or committing any other crimes against his wife and her family, Massoud said. On Friday, the same day Longo Jr. was served with divorce papers, Kristin Longo also had been granted exclusive use and possession of their home, and Longo Jr. was ordered to stay away. But a “refrain from” order doesn’t have as many teeth as a formal order of protection, which would have required a mandatory arrest upon violation, Massoud said. Any violation of the “refrain from” order would likely have resulted in Longo Jr. being found in contempt of court. An order of protection was never issued against Longo Jr., Massoud said, because Kristin Longo believed such an order would cause too much trouble for Longo Jr. at his job with the Police Department and possibly result in his termination. "She was working with his employer to keep him under control and to hopefully get him the help he needed,” particularly counseling for his emotional and violent tendencies, Massoud said. “If he was terminated from his job, then he’d be out on his own and only God knows what would happen.” Kristin Longo felt confident that her husband’s police supervisors were keeping their eye on him, since they already had taken away his service weapon and prohibited him from having any contact with his wife while he was on duty, Massoud said. The Police Department, however, was only able to legally control Longo Jr.’s actions during the eight hours he was at work, Police Chief Daniel LaBella said. Longo Jr.’s behavior had already become a concern over the summer after he inappropriately displayed his weapon on two occasions at Thomas R. Proctor High School... Kristin Longo’s desire for a divorce not only stemmed from marital troubles over her husband’s alleged infidelity and threats of violence; it also was meant to end the longtime verbal abuse she and her four children had to endure, Massoud said. "The course of action that she took is consistent with an abused person who was trying to appease her husband and trying to work things out in a fashion that is not scandalous,” Massoud said... [Full article here]

"This Guest Book will remain online until 10/30/2009"
[Excerpts] ...I had worked with Kristin years ago. A beautiful and kind person who will always be remembered... I'll remember Kristin as one of the most beautiful and sweet people I've ever had the pleasure of meeting... I worked with Kristen and what I remember most is her smile and laughter. She will be greatly missed, her children were of the utmost importance to her and she cherished them with every fiber of her being... I didn't know her for long, but each day that I did, she brought more joy to the world... To Kristin's Children - Do not doubt that your Mom will always be with you and watches over you now from Eternity... Kristin,my "true blue," I will miss you daily. I hope that you are finally at peace. I love you so much! Rest in peace and I know that you will watch over all of us... She was kind & gentle. She always had a smile to offer & a brightness she brought to the room... I am shocked and saddened by the death of Kristin.I worked with Kristin and she was a sweet and gentle person. My prayers and thoughts are with you and her children... Kristin, I will miss you. You were always sweet and kind. You never lacked a smile on your face. You brightened our work space and my prayers are with your family... Kristen was a joy to work with. I will greatly miss her... She was a wonderful, caring woman. She brightened the lives of all she knew here and outside of the workplace. She will be missed terribly... Kristin will really be missed. She was a kind and caring nurse. I enjoyed working with her and getting to know her... Rest in God's peace for you are now in the loving hands and presence of God where there is no more sorrow, no more sadness and no more tears... I will miss Kristen and her cute little perkiness around work. She was a wonderful caring coworker and loved her children dearly.... Kristin was an enthusiastic and caring co-worker who made the office a better place. We all miss her... Kristin, You were a kind, sweet and beautiful woman. You loved your children more than anything in this world. I know you will take care of them even from heaven. I will miss you very much... Kristen was amazing to work with. My deepest sympathies go out to her family. She will truly be missed... To my dear childhood friend so sorry this tragedy has happened... Kristen was an amazing co-worker who always had a positive attitude. Kristen never had a bad word to say about anyone, she was kind, soft spoken and a team player. Kristen adored her children, they meant the world to her. It was obvious what a wonderful mother she was. May your soul find peace Kristen and may god bless your children forever and always. May the healing angels from above come down and hold them tight.

[NY] 1st interview w/ State Police Cpt. Francis Coots after tragedy

[NY] Longo tragedy initial reports (1)

[NY] Longo tragedy initial reports (2)

[NY] Longo tragedy initial reports (3)

[NY] Utica Det. Longo's guns had been removed

[NY] Longo Tragedy - on site news conference

[NY] Coping with tragedy after Det. and Kristin Longo deaths

[NY] Det. & Kristin Longo deaths hard for police

[NY] Detective Longo's murder-suicide hard on chief - his partner of 5 years

[police officer, officer-involved, perpetrated, domestic violence, police department, law enforcement, fatality, fatalities, murder, murder-suicide, new york state]


  1. Your voice for Kristin is incredible. This post is remarkable.

  2. Thank you but I really haven't said much. I have a lot to say. I have a lot of questions - and the main one is how COULD Kristin have stayed safe? With 4 children who have school how could she hide or run? It seems she was situationally trapped and limited to the point that the only choice she had was to fearfully trust the process and hope for the best. I keep asking myself what her choices were. What would I have done differently? What COULD anyone have done differently. Stay strapped and shoot him when he showed up is all I can think of, and not many women are wanting to do that. Maybe if we become more aware of what happened to Kristen, victims will consider that as one of their options.

    It's very important that all departments have a specific policy for handling officers who are imploding. We learned that here in Washington State through our own tragedy, and I hope that New York takes this as a signal that they need to take the steps to be sure that everything is done that can be done.

    Our Tacoma Police Chief David Brame murder-suicide of his wife Crystal [Judson] led to this:


    Our then Governor Gary Locke:
    ..." Her death left us with sobering and agonizing questions: How could this have happened? And what can we do to prevent it from ever happening again?"...



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